YUP!!! I have always said this!! and have asked many married men about this and they back it up. I think it is true for woman too, but like you said we aren't as obvious and more willing to wait for "the one". Loved the musical chairs analogy!
I mean, the science is also there to back it up! And honestly, I don't blame people for behaving that way either 🤷🏼♀️ thank you so much for reading and sharing thoughts 🥰
If marriage and a big fancy wedding weren't sold as final goal to women, more women would marry like men- when the time is right, not when the person is right.
I am glad that we are not reading out Cinderella lived happily ever after fairy tales to our girls anymore.
Men and women are both humans before they are their gender and a product of their time and environment, more than they think.
Read out stories and give them signals that they are supposed to build a home and find and marry the right woman, and you will see how this article will be written from a flipped perspective after a few 100 years.
I’ve always agreed with that theory, but! In this case there’s also the Zoe effect. She gets engaged.. a lot. So there must also something about her. Would love to hear your theories!!
This is also true - I think there could be an element of PR in the relationship but then clearly because Zoe is one of the most beautiful women ever, they've probably also fallen in love. Kind of like Taylor and Travis, I feel like they're both like "well, we're here now, we're both hot, let's just get married" haha
This is really good! I can see a lot of relevance to my own relationship. Though I met my fiancé when his light was off… I think he proposed as soon as he switched it on 🤣
I think a lot of people can relate to it, whether it's from first-hand experience or seeing people around them behave this way - thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it 🥰
Loved your take on this theory, and it makes so much sense. I also believe when the right person comes into your life, even if you’re not ready they make you want to switch your life on. Sometimes things are not supposed to make sense they are quite simply the matching of energies. 🥹♥️
I think this is true but I also don't think it's bad? People encounter one another at different times in their lives and their expectations change accordingly. Ideally, if your light is on, you look for someone else with their light on so there's not misaligned expectations. My light went on when I turned 26, I was seeing someone who really wasn't interested in commitment, he and I "broke up" to the extent that we could because the relationship was very poorly defined (his light was firmly off), and I met my husband that year. I later found out that my "ex" was dismayed that I meant what I said when I told him I wasn't interested in doing that dance anymore because he expected us to wind up together "eventually" -- presumably when his light turned on around 30. It's a real phenomenon, but you can't flip the switch for someone, they have to do it for themselves.
So I met my person originally in college when we were 20 years old. We dated about two months before he broke up with me. We still talked and saw each other on and off while he proceeded to get into back to back long term relationships (the last one because of in a surprise pregnancy and marriage). I was there for him through his divorce, family illnesses/deaths and the bottom dropping out of his industry. He help me through my own custody battle as well as my dads illness and death. We both got to the point 3 years ago that we realized we wanted to be together. 18 years ago we would have never worked, but when the switch flipped it changed everything. The timing finally made sense.
Reading this as a cynical eldest daughter of divorced parents was an unmatched experience hahaha I was thinking about the same thing word by word but you put it in writing sooo well!!
YUP!!! I have always said this!! and have asked many married men about this and they back it up. I think it is true for woman too, but like you said we aren't as obvious and more willing to wait for "the one". Loved the musical chairs analogy!
I mean, the science is also there to back it up! And honestly, I don't blame people for behaving that way either 🤷🏼♀️ thank you so much for reading and sharing thoughts 🥰
I read the musical chairs analogy in the book “the Defining Decade” about the importance of our 20’s
Oh wow - I didn't know other people had thought of it too! I’ll have to check out that book, thank you ☺️
If marriage and a big fancy wedding weren't sold as final goal to women, more women would marry like men- when the time is right, not when the person is right.
I am glad that we are not reading out Cinderella lived happily ever after fairy tales to our girls anymore.
Men and women are both humans before they are their gender and a product of their time and environment, more than they think.
Read out stories and give them signals that they are supposed to build a home and find and marry the right woman, and you will see how this article will be written from a flipped perspective after a few 100 years.
My friends and I also term this “The avocado theory,” when they are ripe, they’re ripe! Have seen many a former fuck boy transformed
Genius! Harry's avo is RIPE
I’ve always agreed with that theory, but! In this case there’s also the Zoe effect. She gets engaged.. a lot. So there must also something about her. Would love to hear your theories!!
This is also true - I think there could be an element of PR in the relationship but then clearly because Zoe is one of the most beautiful women ever, they've probably also fallen in love. Kind of like Taylor and Travis, I feel like they're both like "well, we're here now, we're both hot, let's just get married" haha
I think also woman has this can light on in my opinion, it’s really about when you are ready to commit not when you know you know
I love the last paragraph where you try to balance the scale it’s okay love you can say it we’re pissed off HAAHHAHAHH
it reminds me of john mulaney and anna marie tendler too, but maybe im not factoring in the emotional aspects of his addiction enough
this is how I find out he’s engaged
Why did I love every single word of this?
Ahh thank you so much! I think a lot of people can relate to it
Agree 100%
This is really good! I can see a lot of relevance to my own relationship. Though I met my fiancé when his light was off… I think he proposed as soon as he switched it on 🤣
This was a fun & engaging read!
I think a lot of people can relate to it, whether it's from first-hand experience or seeing people around them behave this way - thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it 🥰
HES TAKEN UP RUNNING WHAT ELSE IS THERE LMAO
He's seen the pope be elected with his own eyes, side quest king is running out of side quests
Loved your take on this theory, and it makes so much sense. I also believe when the right person comes into your life, even if you’re not ready they make you want to switch your life on. Sometimes things are not supposed to make sense they are quite simply the matching of energies. 🥹♥️
The matching of energies makes so much sense, and clearly it's important that both people have their lights switched on for anything to happen!
May this type of mindset never find me
I do not claim any negative energy from this feature 🙅🏼♀️
I think this is true but I also don't think it's bad? People encounter one another at different times in their lives and their expectations change accordingly. Ideally, if your light is on, you look for someone else with their light on so there's not misaligned expectations. My light went on when I turned 26, I was seeing someone who really wasn't interested in commitment, he and I "broke up" to the extent that we could because the relationship was very poorly defined (his light was firmly off), and I met my husband that year. I later found out that my "ex" was dismayed that I meant what I said when I told him I wasn't interested in doing that dance anymore because he expected us to wind up together "eventually" -- presumably when his light turned on around 30. It's a real phenomenon, but you can't flip the switch for someone, they have to do it for themselves.
So I met my person originally in college when we were 20 years old. We dated about two months before he broke up with me. We still talked and saw each other on and off while he proceeded to get into back to back long term relationships (the last one because of in a surprise pregnancy and marriage). I was there for him through his divorce, family illnesses/deaths and the bottom dropping out of his industry. He help me through my own custody battle as well as my dads illness and death. We both got to the point 3 years ago that we realized we wanted to be together. 18 years ago we would have never worked, but when the switch flipped it changed everything. The timing finally made sense.
Reading this as a cynical eldest daughter of divorced parents was an unmatched experience hahaha I was thinking about the same thing word by word but you put it in writing sooo well!!
Like are we just pessimists or is there really something in this? I think it's a bit of both 🫣
I think it’s a bit of both 🙃